Your Favoritest Blog

I'm CoPPerWErkiN it tonight!

2008-08-29T13:40:00.000-07:00

like the alchemist of 9000 B.C.!!

So excited! I'm spending the night at my friend's and we are definitely going!!!

Fun With the English Language and People's Insecurities

2008-08-28T17:24:00.000-07:00

In reference to an idiot poem by the author of 413some

http://413some.blogspot.com/2008/08/poem.html

Idiot Poem

S is for slang for someone with a taint who is also able to queef because they have both male genitalia and female genitalia=quaint

F is for feminine farts

E is for entertaining the idea of you having both male and female parts

E I just told you what E’s for

U is for your undercover vulva from which a flagrant fragrant often departs

(I don’t kno why tho, it’s not supposed to smell)

Q is for how quaint your poem was…

Good News Bad News You Decide:Sallie is Not A Bitch Ok Jenna...Please Be My Fwend

SOOOOOO Sallie’s got this b/f right, you’re gonna LOVE this…

I saw him hugging this girl in the firefly parking lot and it wasn’t Sallie!

Probably got sick of her being such a bitch all the time. Just kidding…she’s not a bitch…don’t worry your little head Jenna. Heard you don’t like me exposing her true nature for all the world to see. (Although her fav book is How to Reach the Masses Without Having to Touch Them)

Now see I was kidding again. Trust me people, if shes friends with Jenna she cant be much of a bitch.

So I actually feel kinda sorry for her because her b/ff aint gonna be her b/f for f if he keeps that up. (In this instance b/f stands for boyfriend). Matter o’ fact I’mma get me some Brandon as long as its up for grabs.

CopperWERKIT!!

Electro Bandit’s playing at the Copperworks tomorrow night!

I’m going to try to go but I’ve got school tomorrow so heres what I’m thinking: I’m going to try to spend the night at my friend Jacquie’s tomorrow . She has this alcoholic headcase for a mother (and get this she makes a living as a therapist haha…ironic right…well really just inappropriate) so she won’t notice or care if we sneak out.

Im going to dress so sexy!! I have to think of what my name will be in order to protect myself from that kid Jake because I heard he wants to add me to his list-if ya know what I mean.

Orgy

Speaking of CopperWorks, there was an orgy there last night and people were drawing it. Weird right?

Aparently orgies are pretty popular.

Me Just Being Cool

Instead of using izz in words to be cool, since nobody does that anymore, I’m going to use idd

My Dead Gay Son is getting Deader and Gayer by the minute…sciddope that shiidit yiddo

Ooo how about queef…scqueefope that shqueefit yqueefo

I'm back Y'ALL!

2008-08-26T16:27:00.000-07:00

So I just came back from a Disney Cruise with the fam! It was great and now I'm sad because I have to go back to school : (
Snow White was there and she was to use her charm and magic to keep everyone entertained in the ballroom. She came fantastically clad with an obvious wig and a pound of make up almost nightly. Sometimes when she was off duty I'd see her at the bar. One night, and I'll never forget this, I saw her pitched over the balcony, costume and all. I actually saw some dribble of vomit at the corner of her mouth before she wiped it away along with her lipstick and began smiling widely perparing to step inside and get everyone hype and dancing.

Maybe it was a bad apple AHAHAhAhahahahha...ok

Ready to commence eavesdropping...

Peps to know (or NOT know ahahahhahahaha)

2008-08-08T08:37:00.000-07:00

SaraG=eats like a bird LOTS of protein and fat but very little vegetable consumption and loves bread crumbs, my feet are smaller

BB=she crazy, my feet are dryer

Tom=hard at work, and I mean like ALWAYS hard at work, got fired for that once

Jchrase=drunk and high, lock up your mommies cuz I heard he freestyles like a mofo, also lock up your liquor cabinet, and your gun and metal bat cabinet, and your weed cabinet, and your books (we don't want him learnin' a read, thas jus a caw far disastah)

A(ss)-F(ucker)=this dude wants to nut on me

Garret=also a musician and fellow assailant to g/f Jenna, he calls all pigs capitalists-it's weird didn't have the heart to tell him Animal Farm was fiction, when I was in line once I saw him pick his nose and flick it in his g/f's hair

Tinman=not in hospital, not hit in chest but arm (see comment 1 in More LCS Drama), sensitive and caring, sensitive about the accuracy of jokes, caring about the accuracy of jokes when it's personal, can be angry at times, comments on blogs, a musician, can probably make jokes though it is not readily apparent, I frequent LCS just to see him...uh I mean so I can...uh find material to make fun of him with, yeah...

Hunter=stop asking, it's never gonna happen

Kristin=hates the hair on her arm and once shaved it off, now she looks like a monkey, an Italian monkey (those are the hairiest due to the entire country's characteristic climate and Arabic cross breading), except she wants me to mention that at least she looks like an anomalous monkey with opposable thumbs, except I want to mention that most monkeys have opposable thumbs, except she wants to add that some don't

Jenna=a small wonder of a woman, a physical contradiction of sorts, I have no clue how old this girl is- it's strange when you're the same height as someone who has a tiny voice, you just want to pick them up and cradle them but that would just be a physical impossibility-guess if you implement some sort of pulley system...
...I will find a way if it's the last thing I do

2008-08-05T18:36:00.000-07:00

Affairs
My friend who works at this restaurant in Housatonic just told me about an affair the owner's having with a girl who works there! And she's like WAY younger than him. That's all I'll say about that.

That's marriage...and sometimes it's an egg.
And sometimes when you break it open you think it's gonna be all white and there's a little black thing with blood in it.

Brittney B got so drunk the other night she peed on her feet. Idiot.
That actually made her more stupid. This is what she looked like afterwards...

...black and in jail.

My Cyber Friend with Potential Benefits with Bed Rheumy Eyes to Die for
OK, so Gonnagetya56 and I haven't yet decided what we really are. I really like him but if he can't commit, like spend at least hours just Google Chatting and I mean a quality hours, not him responding to me after 3 minutes because he's watching the game or something, then I'm going to have to find someone else who can give me the attention I deserve. I kind of have the feeling he looks at other girls online too. I guess I'm just confused cuz he's so damn SEXY, did you see his pic!? Here it is again, ladies get your swoonin couch ready...

Nosey Ass Bitches...Hairy Butt Hos...Booby Dick Pricks...Hippie Pit Sluts...this just gets more fun...Shitty...uh...Twat Asses

I have another friend at SOCO who said he came "this close" to exposing my identity to some kids he heard talking about me. Leave me alone and stop talking about me! Can't a girl live in clandestine peace!That's a hippie pit

Confirmed!

2008-08-04T11:56:00.001-07:00

Dear readers and bitches of the world,
We have confirmation that the girl from Virgina is a BITCH! Thanks to the peps at mydeadgayson, a hilarious blog I have to say especially because they agree with me about the girl from VAG. Her name by the way is Sallie, so don't talk to her because I tried once and found out she only knows how to talk shit and roll her eyes and not let other people write for her blog.

Peace,
Ho

More LCS Drama

2008-08-04T11:40:00.000-07:00

I just heard something that may shock you. Remember that guy whose always drunk? He's name is Jake. That's not the surprising part though. Everyone seems to think he's friends with "Tin Man" (Johnny) because they act all friendly like in front of others. BUT turns out Tin Man punched Jake (apparently he calls himself Jcraze or probably JKraze) in the face. THEN JKrazy hit Tin Man in the chest with a metal bat and hospitalized the kid. Guess he's not made of steel like I thought.
Oh and JKrze is banned from Rummpy's I think from starting a fight with the bartender or just for being too drunk or both.

Also, there's this guy that's always at the LCS, maybe in his early 50's and he has so many stories about going to festivals but I warn you if you want to strike up a convo with this intriguing fellow you might not want to lead on that you have a car because he is frequently "whooped" and will ask for a ride.

There also this guy Ernie and he's magic. You might want to stay on his good side, even though that seems to be the only side he has. He could probably pull some weird voodoo shit on your ass if you're not careful.

2008-07-30T12:15:00.001-07:00

This just in...a few days ago.

Andrew of 413some, totally has a crush on me AND has proof that Jenna and Garret are cat killers!

Ok, awesome news...one of the guys that puts on movie night, dubbed "most eligible bachelor in Pittsfield" is now taken!
The girl in none other than Andrew's younger, equally jewish sister.

I'll be back later!

Bitch, please

2008-07-25T22:37:00.001-07:00

omg ok so like that Andrew kid I was writing about totally put up a link to my page! What an asshole.
In other news, I've been in CT for a few days visiting people who are related to me.

In other other news, there's this girl from VA who thinks she's hot shit too obviously because she started a blog. I always thought she was a bitch because I'd see her at the coffee shop and she'd ignore people until she felt like insulting them. Also, I wouldn't have said that if she'd respond to my comment on her blog. But whatever, I see how it is.

That Jenna girl who works at the LCS (Lenox coffee shop) was talking about some kids who found baby shrews and then killed them violently to end their suffering.

Still not sure about whether Jenna and Garret ran over a cat and hid it.

Do Kids Like Crack Like Adults Do?

2008-07-21T16:29:00.000-07:00

Eh, look at the little girl's butt crack. What a slut.
Aww look at the one to the left. And he's even trying to cop a feel, how cute!
Wait a minute...what does that say about our society...well pretty much that American girls should stop being such whores. Boys, you know, they just doin their thang.

My friend, Tom has a nephew who's like 7 or something. He never wears a belt which is no big deal if your pants fit and you wear underwear. He's definitely got a butt crack because I saw it.

It's the kind of butt crack that makes you want to slip something in it like a blade of grass or a pencil. Apparently it makes people want to blow on it also which is what my friend did. The boy cried, for like 10 minutes. AND his mother came out, not to scold the kid for being such a pussy, but Tom for giving in to the unbearable temptation to interact with that exposed butt crack. You know it's only natural and I actually commend Tom for not letting social rules get in the way of visceral urges and you know what I think he taught that kid a good lesson. If you're a minor and you have an exposed private part, stay away from grown men because it's a fact of life that they can't control themselves.

Movie Night!!

2008-07-19T07:51:00.000-07:00

Public Privates

OMG so I just heard there's a "movie night" to cure your mundane Mondays in Pittsfield every week. The people who put it on couldn't find the movie or something and so they randomly chose "Sex and Lucia" last week. Well I guess it wasn't random cuz they probably chose it on account of the word sex. They project the film on a building for the public to view. This is what everyone saw:
I tried to edited out the illicit material.

The film is Spanish so I guess they had subtitles. Children lie snugly in their beds lulled to sleep very slowly by loud grunting sounds and hours of people talking in an incomprehensible language.

Gonnagetya56's New Pic!

By the way, that boy I've been talking to finally found another pic. It's because I told him I'd block him if he didn't haha!

lookin good!!!

OK I have to go babysit but I'll be back with more juicier gossip about this and surrounding tiny towns.

Got Grounded For No Reason!

2008-07-17T05:13:00.000-07:00

I was grounded for no reason yesterday so I couldn't write. My dad literally came in my room and said "Stay in here for the rest of the night! For no reason!" Ughhh! SO not fair

My dad thinks I'm writing to some middle aged perv who's only pretending to be a 17 year old boy. Dad has no clue how talented and responsible GonnaGetya56 is. He's already manager of the local video store Raunchy Vids and he said he's got the skills to get alcohol anytime I want. Here's a picture of him, it's the only one he could find.

I heard Electrobandit was playing at Helsinki but I can't get in so I didn't even try. I hope you guys had fun! Without me. The other guy is Garret and he rides a scooter to work with his girlfriend Jenna. One time, I think they hit somebody's cat and didn't tell anybody and hid it in the bushes. But I could be making that up, I don't know.

Taylor's sister was in town recently. She is supposedly crazy. Sometimes, she'll get drunk and drive up to a cop and talk to them. She's pretty and stuff but I hear you can't really trust her.

There was a dog fight at the coffee shop and I think it was with this guy John's dog. The dog fought a kitten whose owner often brings him on a leash. I tried to tell the guy not to worry, kittens get discarded by the millions and he could even get a free one off the street if he wanted to. I don't think John is allowed back.

Sorry I've been stowed away so that's all I got for now!

Gossip Goddess

2008-07-15T14:42:00.000-07:00

OK more like Gossip Slut
I'm just a teen with some keen insight and a knack for evoking entertaining social interactions. I will write about them here so you can be as entertained as I. I also know the best gossip of my town and I'll expose it all here.

I'm pretty cool actually so I hangout with mostly older than me people. I'll usually meet these friends incidentally at the local coffee shop. We have a lot of fun hanging out there smoking cigarettes. Sometimes when they don't acknowledge me because they probably didn't see me walk up, I listen to their conversations so I can hear about all the cool things they do when I'm not around.

Random Gossip
Speaking of the coffee shop, there's a guy that hangs out a lot there and I think he's either drunk all the time or that's his face.

This guy who works there, Johnny, is a machine. His body is made out of steel. I'll call him the tin man. Wait, that's tin. He stole his own money once.
Oh he's in Electrobandit.

Emilio got a pretty new dish towel at work today. It's all white and looks like it was torn off an even bigger dish towel. He seems proud of it although I wouldn't know because I don't speak south american.

From being a big asshole in a small pond to being and even bigger asshole in an even bigger pond
Andrew seems to think he's funny for some stupid reason, coincidentally enough he makes people laugh. But now after some sort of ego bj he got in Cali he seems to think he's funny enough to start his own blog, 413some. He even makes up all the people on his page, taking pictures of girls at bars he doesn't even know, then posting them. Don't even think that shits legal. This is what he looks like and this is what his blog address looks like:
http://413some.blogspot.com/

All talk and no 3some
So the kids here in the Berkshires make quite a clam of debauchery but I've yet to see anything other than a few parties where everybody has sex with each other-and then switches partners AND sometimes even sexes. They don't switch their own sex cuz no one can obviously, only their partner's. You know, like, homosexuality.
I'd like to see just ONE more example of this sexiness or I won't believe it. Until then I'll assume every one's lying to look cool in front of me.

E=MC413
There was this guy at this club in new york and he said he grew up in Cambridge and is now an MC. His parents wanted him to go to Harvard but he says all he wanted to do was spit. Now he does a bunch of ecstasy and mumbles loudly over whatever other rap song's playing at the time and you can only make out the last part of each sentence. But they do rhyme, usually. Sometimes he cheats (language can be hard) especially when he finds a good word. For example: "sdifhoiah aofih aoirhoaw awuo what" "setuhaeu aerhohy her twat" "wihoi eututtj uhh kick his twat". I think he was drunk or at least I hope he was. Otherwise kids, don't do so much ecstasy and probably a combination of a lot of meth/crack and rebellious self-inflicted ignorance. Don't be born stupid neither.